When I Grow Up !

What do you want to be when you grow up?  This is a question we all asked our children and a question that we were asked.  I invite you to remember how you answered this question when your parents asked you this.  We are told as young children we can do what ever we want to do but few of us ever do.

We get caught up in life, paying bills bringing up kids and other distractions.  It is a dam shame.  I hear many people saying I want to start a business but the problem is that most people’s idea of this is really to buy a job owning some shop or office.  Yes you might be the boss but with that comes bills, payrolls and more hours than you would work if you were employed.  We are told to get a great education but that leads to student loans for most of us that take 20-30 years to pay off.  The vast majority of us simply get stuck in the rat race.

So what should we do?  I hear many people say do what you love but this is fine if what you love also has a demand in the markets but the reality is if it is something you love to do many others also love to do it and the market is saturated.  There is no good living to make in what you love to do or else you would be already doing it.

The reality is most of us sacrifice the majority of our time for a day or two to do what we want to do.  The weekend yes!!! you tell yourself.  No work until Monday.yes!!!!   The truth is time is the real commodity that is most precious in life not money.

The problem is we need money to live.  So what is the answer?  I guess it is to think of a need of many people and fill that need so you make a boat load of money and then you don’t have to work anymore.  Of course I cannot tell you what that is but there is a demand out there that will fulfill a need and can make you very wealthy.  The real thing about money is not the security that it buys us but instead the time it frees up for us to be able to do what we really love.

Since most of us will never be super rich what can we do to enjoy the free time we have?  I guess lifelong learning is the answer. Learn something different and see if you like it.  Hobbies will keep your mind sharp and give you an outlet from the reality of life.  It will also get you up from the couch wasting time watching some reality program.  Try to fulfill your life with passions who knows maybe you might stumble on something that will make you money and free up your time.

I am not saying that life sucks I am just stating that the real thing you can’t buy or steal or otherwise collect is time so don’t waste it sitting around watching mindless things on TV.  Read a book go to a museum try something different.  Involve your family and friends and have some fun.  This is the best way to escape from the rat race in your spare time.  Open your mind and try something different!!!

Many of you are probably thinking what spare time however make a journal of the amount of time you sit at home and watch the TV.  That is spare time where you could be following new interests.  Too tired?  You won’t be if you find something you become passionate about.

What do you want to be when you grow up?  I say it is never to late to dream and when you do dream large and enjoy your journey to finding new passions everyday.

Claude Timothy

Change your Habit Change your Life

We all live by our habits whether you realize it or not.  When you get up in the morning you have your routine for instance you go to the bathroom, brush your teeth put the coffee pot on and turn on the news.  You do it without even thinking the habit or routine is ingrained.  But what if you want to break the routine say you want to begin working out in the morning and stick with it it has to become a habit.

Habits are formed in three parts trigger, action, and reward are the elements.  Let me explain using the example of your morning routine.  The alarm clock goes off (the trigger) you go to the bathroom and relieve yourself (the action) you feel relief (the reward) then you notice your breath and mouth taste / smell bad which is the trigger so you brush your teeth which is the action and your mouth feels refreshed which is your reward.  You think of the things you need to do which triggers the action to put the coffee pot on and you have a cup of coffee and get the caffeine pick-me-up as your reward.  You then walk into your bedroom and see the TV this triggers you to take action and turn on the TV you get noise or information as your reward.  The cycle on most days for people is the same routine for the most part unless something unusual happens.  Even then your mind will search for the routine you use for whatever is happening.

The psychologist’s and scientist’s that study behavior state that if we want to change a habit we should keep the trigger and the reward put change the action.  Lets say you want to quit smoking you smoke throughout the day at various times and in various situations.  You first have to figure out the trigger.  You can discover the trigger by writing down what you do or feel just before you light up a cigarette.  Is it boredom, anxiety or whatever it is.  You will still get a craving for the reward which for most people at the root is psychological because the physical addiction to nicotine only lasts about 4-5 days.  Your reward might be it relaxes you.  You also need to track what relief you get from it which will be tied to your trigger somehow.  now that we know the trigger and the reward we have to replace the action of smoking with another habit and continue to reinforce it with the reward.  So after tracking for 2 weeks you discover you smoke when you’re feeling stressed out and smoking relieves the feeling of the stress.  So now we know the trigger (stress) the action (smoking) and the reward (relaxation).  So you have to replace the action because you will get the trigger and crave the reward.  You may figure out taking a deep breath or a short walk relieve stress so every time you begin to feel stress you take 3 deep breaths or have a short walk and you still get the relaxed feeling as a reward keep doing this and the action you replace smoking with will become your habit.

This can be applied to anything say you want to start working out every morning  Well when you think of the thing you need to do for the day instead of turning on the coffee pot workout and you would still get a pick-me-up as the reward from the endorphin’s that your body will produce.

Most of us want to change something in our routine or something we do such as smoking or working out or stop overeating well the psychologist’s say that the formula I just gave you is the way.  There is a very good book called The Power of Habit and Why we do What we do in Life and in Business by Charles Duhigg which goes into this theory in more detail with great stories as examples so if you want to change something and struggle with the change get the book either buy it or borrow it from you library.

Let me know what you did to change something in your life and please like the blog on facebook and become a member.

Take care

Claude Timothy

Giving Friends a Handup!

It is Christmas time and I believe this is a time of year that we should all be thinking of others and what we can do for them to make life easier.  It would be great if this spirit could last all year long, what a better world it would be to live in.

I heard a story that I cannot verify as to its truthfulness but that doesn’t matter so much as the message of the story.  The story goes something like this.  A man (I’ll call John) had a brain aneurysm and needed to have surgery that rendered him disabled and no longer able to work.  John had three children and a wife. His wife had to take an extended unpaid leave from her job to care for John.  John applied for Social Security and of course they turned him down and he had to wait for a hearing to have their case reviewed by an Administrative Law Judge.  The wait was estimated at 18 months.  The family was sinking fast in a financial sense and did not know where to turn.

The wife posted the Family dilemma on John’s face book page to let his friends know why he was not talking to them.  There was a lady (I’ll Call her Linda) that went to college with John.  Linda had not seen John for more than 15 years but they kept in touch through face book.  Linda  always liked John and she had fond memories of good times with him and other friends during her college days.  Linda wanted to help out John and his family.

Linda was looking over a river while eating her lunch during her lunch hour and she began to think to herself that John would appreciate the scenery she was enjoying so she took a picture of it from her cell phone. Later that night she began to ponder on how she could help John and his family but she did not have much money to help out directly.  Then she went on her face book page and thought about all the mutual friends that they had on face book.  Suddenly an Idea came to her.  She asked all of their mutual friends to think about John and take a picture of whatever they saw at the time they were thinking of him and email it to her with a caption.

Linda received a few hundred pictures and then decided to go to a website where you could download pictures and captions and have a picture book produced.  She ordered 50 copies at first and put them up for sale on the face book asking for the price of the book plus $5.00.  To her amazement the first 50 books sold out in under an hour so she ordered another 100 copies and they too sold out.  People that didn’t even know John started to buy the book and she sold over 1500 copies.  She was able to send John and his family just under $8,000!

Again this is an example of friends helping a friend that is in dire straits with a little ingenuity.  As I ponder on this story it reminds me that because of the wonderful technology available with social media we have once again become a community.  When I was a kid we all went out and played together and if a neighbor had a problem often the neighbors would help out as best as they could.  Today with social media we can all keep in touch and help each other out when it is needed.

I guess the point is none of us are isolated from friends if we don’t want to be.  It doesn’t matter the distance or the time.  The other point is that when the chips are down for a friend we should do what is feasible to assist them.  I love this story and I don’t know if it is true or not but as I said I want to believe it is true.  This type of story makes me believe that Humans do care and will help those that they have relationships with.

I thank social media for keeping me in touch with people I thought I would never hear from again.  We live in a wonderful time where we can help each other out.  Please have a great Christmas and remember to reach out at any time of the year for those you care about and especially those like John in the story who have fallen on bad times, through no fault of their own, and need a hand up.

Thanks for reading

Claude Timothy

My quit smoking plan

Well here is my plan to quit smoking.  It is designed to motivate me to stop.  It works and the principals can be applied to change any behavior you wish to change.  I will fully explain this is a future post but for now I wanted you to know my plan.

My Quit Smoking plan

This is what will be if I don’t quit smoking!

                        If I continue to smoke I will have trouble breathing and I will cough until I pass out. Phlegm will clog my throat and eventually I will either have a severe heart attack or contract cancer. Either one would be debilitating and will result in a slow and painful death. I will not be healthy enough to pursue any dreams because of the lack of energy and the lack of oxygen from the phlegm that is clogging my throat. I will wheeze and cough to the point that I will be isolated from everyone except healthcare professional. I will be very lonely.

 

Game that will motivate me

                        Smoking costs me $11.00 daily, $77.00 weekly, $ 335.00 monthly, $4015.00 annually. I will put $11.00 per day into the jar. I will have the money banked for each week I am successful. Any week that I smoke the money that week will go to the MADD. I will have Rose monitor this for me and pay out the money if I don’t succeed.   This will apply for one year.

 

Motivation statement

                        Remember choking on your own phlegm when you have dairy products or soda. Remember coughing until you passed out. Remember the acid re-flux you suffered. You will get sick from smoking and you will die gurgling on your own body fluids. This will be painful and it will hurt your loved ones who see this. It will be an indignant way to die.

Stop smoking although you can’t

 

            Crucial moments need to be recognized.  These are moments when you are likely to go off the plan.

                        The crucial moments are:

When alone at the office

After a meal

While driving

When going into a store that sells cigarettes

Vital Behaviors

                                    Do not buy cigarettes before going into a store that sells cigarettes read Motivation statement.

After a meal read motivation statement, sit in a different seat when I have breakfast outside.

No smoking in the car.

Completely clean the inside of the car on first weekend.

No smoking in the office.

Get rid of ashtrays in the office.

Monitor and look at the no smoking app on smart phone.

Tell everyone you quit.

If I smoke pay up to MADD and start again that week

The most tempting time is when I am alone when alone and I feel the urge I will read motivation statement and look at no smoking app and the jar when available.

Do work or practice magic to distract myself.

            Turn accomplices into friends this gives you support for weak moments.

Accomplices are people who don’t know me that smoke with me and people that smoke.

The people that influence my life are, my wife, the kids and friends.

I will talk to those I regularly associate with and ask them not to smoke around me. They should not let me go outside with them when they smoke and never give me a cigarette. If they do not comply I will have to stop seeing them for at least 6 months until I have controlled the addiction.

I will ask for encouragement and monitoring from those I see regularly.

I will ask the people I don’t see as often to at least ask if I still quit and cheer me on or say nothing and do not encourage if I have a week moment.

I will cut out of my life anyone, except for particular times that business must be conducted, that will not comply.

True picture of the world even though it may seem most smoke it is because I tend to associate with the smokers when I socialize.

It is the minority of people that smoke regardless of how it may seem to me given the many who I associate with. It is not normal for an animal of any kind especially humans to smoke.

            I want to able to breath and not choke on my own phlegm. I want to be able to feel free to be in any social situation without people thinking I stink and without having to excuse myself to go smoke.

Invert the economy reward myself as an insentive.

            I will be able to spend a week’s money saved after the second week of not smoking that way there is always money in the jar if I slip. After the first week I can buy a, believe and dream, disk to carry with me at all times as a reminder. This game will continue for one year. I will open a separate savings account for the not smoking fund that each week’s money will go into on Friday. If I mess up the money will be taken from the jar. The money goes into the jar at each days beginning which means midnight.

The first week I can have a daily reward by looking on the computer for fun purposes for one hour if I choose to. If I smoke I do not get fun time on the computer that day.

Control your environment around you to minimize the temptation

            I will not buy cigarettes and read the motivation statement before going into any place that sells cigarettes and whenever I am tempted.

I will get rid of all ashtrays in the office. That does not mean put them away I will throw them away.

I will not allow smoking in my office.

I will sit in a different seat when I sit in the backyard.

I will always carry the motivation statement with my tab.

I will track on habit factor app

I will look at quit smoking app

I will open account for not smoking

I will save in jar for not smoking.

I will not allow smoking in my car.

I will clean my car out

I will read this entire plan every day after exercise or as soon thereafter as plausible.

 If something is not working adapt and improvise

Adjust plan as needed

 

My first change decision for this site.

Recently I had an accident where I fell down the stairway at home and cracked multiple ribs on my left side.  I couldn’t breath , sleep or find comfort in any way.  After four days my wife took me back to the emergency room because I had a high temperature, regurgitating profusely and full of a green color of congestion.  I additionally was coughing so much and although I couldn’t say anything she could see I was in excruciating pain from coughing with the cracked ribs.  It felt like I was being kicked by a horse every time I coughed.

The Hospital admitted me because I had developed bacterial pneumonia.  I was in the hospital for five days before they discharged me. When I was discharged they sent me home with a plethora of medications and with an oxygen bottle and machine.  The oxygen scared me because I didn’t know how long I would be on it and the Doctor said it could be the rest of my life.

Now I’m 63 years old and considered myself relatively healthy.  I’m somewhat overweight weighing 210 pounds and standing at only 5 foot 8 inches tall.  I was taking some medication for hyper tension.   Although my work is sedentary in nature I am an active person who exercise and walks every time it is practical.

I have been a smoker since my late teens and I will say that I do enjoy smoking but obviously it is not good for me so I have made a decision to quit smoking forever!   I have stopped smoking several times in the past and the longest time was about five months.  I tried to use the nicotine patches that didn’t work.  I tried using Chantix and had an allergic reaction to the medication and had to discontinue using it.  I tried Wellbutrin and again it helped me cut down the amount I smoked but I was not able to stop and, the I just decided to quit and that was the most successful attempt which lasted for five months.

Well as of writing this post I have not smoked for 17 days.  The firs five days I was in the hospital and could not smoke.  I am not using any smoking cessation aids whatsoever.  Instead I learned of a way to change anything I desired to change.  We will discuss my method in detail on my next post but for today I wanted to publicly declare that I am a permanent non-smoker.

This decision has an effect on all four foundations.  The first foundation is body and by being a permanent non-smoker it has many desired improvements for the body.  Carbon monoxide levels are normal after the first eight hours of ceasing smoking, sudden death risk is lowered after twenty-four hours, taste and smell are regained after three days, standardization of your respiratory function is back in five days and physical dependence on nicotine is eliminated in seven days.  Ninety days after your last cigarette blood circulation, premature and skin hydration are improved.  One year after your last cigarette your risk of heart disease death is halved and five years after your last puff the risk of developing lung cancer is the same as a person who never smoked.  Yes obviously this is a big one for the first foundation because of the impact that becoming a permanent non-smoker has on your physical health.

The second foundation is also impacted because you must be able to over come the psychological addiction which is more difficult to beat than the physical addiction to nicotine.  You will need to concentrate more of a strategy to over come the psychological triggers and impulses which are what causes most people to fail a change from a habit that started out as a poor choice.  In fact when we decide to make a change it is my belief that the mind or spirit in which you take on the challenge are the most important key to succeeding in your plan to change.

It will certainly have an impact on relationships that you have.  For instance you will stop going out with the smokers for a smoke break and those dynamics will certainly have a major change in your relationship with those who you joined for your smoking ritual during breaks at work.  Also people who don’t smoke will notice that you don’t have the smell of stale smoke emanating from your clothes and body anymore.  This will make you more pleasant to be around.  Of course whom ever you are more intimate with will notice the freshness clean smell more than anyone else.  Also you will become more proud and confident because your sense of smell and taste will come back and you will feel a great sense of accomplishment at mastering the dreaded tobacco . So every relationship that you have will be impacted to some degree even the relationship you have with yourself.

The fourth foundation will have an obvious positive affect because I smoke two pack of cigarettes per day costing $5.50 per pack so that is $11.00 per day or $77.00 per week, $334.00 per month or $4015.00 annually.  That is a good vacation or any other number of things I might need or desire.

Therefore by making this one decision to become a permanent non-smoker it will positively impact all four foundations so that it will help lead me to a successful and happy life.  That is the goal of this site to make positive changes that will make life more successful and happy.

I will discuss my plan for succeeding in this choice in my next post.  For now I will tell you I have a complete plan that is fluid enough so that I can adapt and improvise the plan where I see a portion may need to be reinforced or revised for success.  I do guarantee that the change plan method I have devised will work 100% of the time as long as you are motivated and truly want to make the change it cannot fail.

I’ll discuss the plan in the next post.  Have a great weekend and always enjoy yourself.

Claude Timothy

What my assumptions are for this site

I am writing this blog because I want to explore how to build a more satisfying life.  I hope to give advice on the foundations to a Satisfying and Healthy life for anyone who is interested.  From my point of view there are four foundations in which to build a better life.  The foundations are (1) The body, this includes nutrition, exercise, quiting bad habits and, a wellness plan. (2) Mind and Spirit which includes learning, faith, meditation, and happiness.  (3) Relationships to include significant other, friends, family and aquaintences. and the last foundation (4) Finances which includes career, spending , revenue and, savings.

The foundations will have a lot of crossover with each other but it is the assumption that these four foundations are the key to all of life’s door to a satisfying happy life.

Therefore if you body is in great condition and you use your mind to learn to be the best you can and you have a supporting and loving circle of friends and family, with fulfilling work that allows you to take care of your needs and wants you will have a life where you will feel satisfaction and happiness.

I will also welcome comments and recommendations from readers.  I will also begin to post on this a couple of times per week.  I hope you will enjoy it!!

We focus on change for a better life

We all go through changes throughout our lives.  Some changes come because we want to make them and other changes are thrust upon us.  Regardless of how it happens our lives are fluid and changes are inevitable.

Sometimes we want to make a change but are unable to make the transition.  Other times the change causes upheaveal in our life and we have difficulty adjusting to it.  Still often the change is planned and embraced in a positive way.

I will teach you how to plan so that you will be able to transition into any change you desire.  If you lack the will power such as weight loss or smoking cessation we will make a plan for that.  If it is something that causes you anxiety or stress we have a plan to alleviate that also.

Therefore we will concentrate on how to accept changes that are thrust upon us and how to ease into changes that we want to make but are unsure of how to make the transition for the wanted change.

We will also concentrate on starting a business on a very low budget.  The reason we will look at this and plan for it is because losing your livelihood is perhaps one of the most freighting changes that are thrust upon us.

I believe that the days of having a job for life where the company will take care of you through retirement and death are over.

We need to begin to think like an entrepuneur these days.  The big problem for most people is that the thought of being your own boss is scary and the reality of it makes people feel very insecure.

Therefore this web site will be dedicated to helping you make life-style changes that are good for you and to help you find a way to become an independent self-sufficient individual.

There will be a substantial information to help people out but there will also be material that you will have to purchase if you want it.

But for today I ask that you follow me and I will post some material at least once a week that will be useful to your life in some way.

Thank you for reading

Claude Timothy